Rum Tasting

My friend, Soly, and I were to go to a rum tasting on the river.  We were looking forward to it until the riverboat company closed its doors.  While this was disappointing, I felt bad for those who had party plans, family gatherings and weddings scheduled with this company.

As you can see above, I have a good collection of rums.  That is my kitchen table.  It made sense to host my own rum tasting on my deck.  Soly came over with some cigars and we had a very enjoyable afternoon sipping rum, smoking stogies and chatting.  Life is good, good friends make it even better.

I know you're all wondering the outcome, sitting on the edge of your seat.  Our top three - Ron Zacapa Centenario, Matusalen Gran Reserva, and Pyrat XO.  Now you know what to get me for Christmas.

Coke vs Coke

Caffeine is a legal drug to which most of us have some addiction.  I need to have some every day.  I start to feel run down and get a nasty headache if I don't have some for lunch.  This is less of an addiction than I've had in the past.

My prefered method of getting my fix is by drinking Coke.  I've never acquired the taste for coffee.  While it smells great, the taste just puts me off.  Of course, Coke goes perfect with my rum.  Other methods people use include pills, gum and chocolate.

So what's the difference between these two Cokes?

The one in the bottle is made in Mexico.  That's not really what's important however.  It is made with sugar instead of high fructose corn syrup.  Same 12 ounces but quite a different taste.  The flavor is the same but with sugar the texture is less syrupy.  Most people probably wouldn't notice or care.

Crabby knows what I like and hooked me up with a stock of the Mexican nectar for Christmas.  Until the rest of America catches up, I hope this type stays available.  It is more expensive but then I'm worth it.  Arriba salud!

Paunchy Pooches

America is known as a country of fatties.  There are plenty who point fingers and lay blame.  All manner of foods and additives are targeted but in the end it's a simple equation.  If you consume more calories than you burn off, the excess gets stored.

So eat less and get some exercise.  If only it were that easy.  Apparently even our pets seem to have this problem.  Thankfully Science Diet has a solution.

No longer do our dogs have to suffer ridicule and not being able to fit in their bikini.  They also don't have to bother with exercise.  Everything they need is in this one box.  Unless of course they want an online system to help them reach their goals.

I know I'm going to sound negative towards the system but how about just feeding them less?  They don't have opposable thumbs to get the food themselves.  If the owner can't be bothered with regular food, how exactly will this system help?

So look for my PaunchyPooches.com site to be launched shortly.  For a small monthly fee, I can guarantee even the most difficult dog will lose weight if they follow my plan.  They can track their progress online and gain support from hundreds of other dogs across the country.  The less they gain, the better they are.

(this is all trademarked so don't even try)

Crime in the city

Tofu girl was visiting a friend in New York City.  Unfortunately her friend was working during the visit which meant her days were spent by herself.  She knew I was off and invited me up for the day.  What a great excuse to get into the city.  Of course I said yes.  I'm so glad I wore long johns.

It has been quite awhile since I saw the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree.  I think this is the first time I saw it after the holiday.  We got to see the store window displays too.  Then it was off to one the many Irish pubs for lunch.

We were set on seeing a show but still undecided.  It was between a Comedy and Mystery thriller.  I chose the latter, Perfect Crime.  We got our half price tickets are went off to find the Snapple theater.  It was quite off Broadway, up several flights of stairs and could have been mistaken for a conference room.  To be fair, the show has been running since 1987 and we did get seats in the second row.  We both enjoyed the play but didn't figure it out before the end.

After a bit of window shopping and drooling over expensive watches, we landed in another Irish pub.  Just a few drinks before dinner.  And some nachos with the meat on the side for yours truly.  Her friend wasn't feeling well and decided to get some rest.  We finished our day at Alfredo's.  Some wonderful pasta and a couple more drinks.  Even shared a nice dessert.

All good things come to an end and I had to get back to the train station.  It left just before midnight.  There weren't too many people on board.  I figured I could rest on the trip back.  As I sat back with my eyes closed, a very familiar scent drifted my way.  The quiet gentleman in front of me was smoking a spliff and I was finishing my day with a passive high.  If only I didn't have to drive home.

Iron (Pyrite) Chef

If you read the Thanksgiving post, you may be wondering how I made it this far in life with little cooking experience.  Maybe your thoughts didn't go that far but I'll illuminate you anyway.

I did help my Mom in the kitchen as a kid.  It wasn't much but at Christmas I would help decorate the cookies.  I learned how to make scrambled eggs and pop popcorn on the stove.  Yes, before there were microwaves we would make popcorn in a pan on the stove.  Beyond that, Mom took care of the rest.

I went off to college.  Two words - meal plan.  There was always food available and I would keep heat and eat type things in my room.  The dorm had a full kitchen but I had no clue what to do with it.  During my last year in the dorms, I paid a guy down the hall to buy groceries and make dinner.  He got to eat for free and I had to clean up afterwards.  It was a great deal.  He treated me to cornish game hens.

My final year, I moved out of the dorms and in with a friend.  He had more cooking ability than I but we still ate prepared meals that required little real cooking.  My grocery shopping didn't include actual ingredients.

I started dating the girl I would eventually marry.  She happened to be a gourmet cook and would bring over her own supplies.  This is when I was first introduced to heavy cream.  I put on 35 pounds from her meals.  Those who knew me at the time would agree I needed the extra weight.  A 31 inch waist on my 6 foot height will give you some idea.  Her cooking was one of the reasons I married her.

When the marriage ended, I was back to eating prepared food.  The small apartment I moved to did not have a full kitchen but I did my best.  I started with chili and meat loaf.  I learned to make bacon and pancakes.  This came in especially handy for those mornings I didn't wake up alone.  I still wasn't really cooking.

She who shall not be named came along and we would eat at restaurants mostly.  Moving in together didn't change much.  She wasn't much of a cook either.  The quality of prepared meals has gotten better but these still aren't very good for you.

Back to me!  Chili is back on the menu now that I'm single but I was told it needs to be made with fresh ingredients.  I was amazed at the taste difference using real vegetables and pieces of beef rather than ground.

So I'm on my way to being a real cook.  I just slow roasted a salmon steak and it turned out great.  Pulled pork is next.  Yes, I'm bragging.

Thanksgiving 2010

If you believe retailers, Thanksgiving is merely a speed bump on the way from Halloween to Christmas.  I find this sad.  This is the one day of the year to focus on the positive.  Wallow in it even.  Yes, I'm imaging myself in a bathtub sized gravy boat filled with gooey happiness.

I have plenty for which I'm thankful.  I could fill up this blog and totally bore you.  I'm not trying to be a braggart, just stating my case.  Top of my list is family and friends.  We've shared the laughs and tears, the bitching and beers.  My life would be less rich and not as interesting without them.

When I found out that Thanksgiving would just be with my parents, I decided to have them to my place.  I planned on ordering a cooked dinner from one of the many stores nearby.  Previous experience with this was very good.  But I changed my mind and decided to challenge myself with doing the cooking.  Yes, I do have fire extinguishers handy.

I got my recipes together and asked for some advice from others.  The menu was a 6 lb turkey breast, mashed potatoes, rolls and cranberry sauce.  Mom brought brussels sprouts, a salad and a pumpkin pie.  I outsourced an apple pie from a friend.  Realize that I've made it this far in life without ever making any of these items before.  Sure, I've helped in the kitchen but this time was all me.  I wonder why the cats are hiding?

Two days before Thanksgiving, I made the cranberry sauce and rolls.  I couldn't believe how easy real cranberry sauce is to make.  I was even feeling confident enough to add raisins to the mix.  It was a little sweet but good.  Making the rolls was more of a challenge.  I have fond memories of my bread maker.  The recipe detailed making shapes out of the dough so I gave those a try too.  In for a pound as they say.  Once done and cooled, I wrapped them and froze them.  I guess the fire blanket wasn't needed this time.

The confidence of my successes carried me through to Thanksgiving morning.  First, I had to put on my glasses to make sure the snow falling wasn't just my sleepy eyes.  It wasn't much and the temp kept it from laying.  I don't what type of omen this was but I didn't have time to think about it.  Bring on the bird!

Facing off against the turkey breast, I was prepared for a fight.  Rosemary, garlic, butter and paprika were to go between the skin and the meat.  The skin had to be pulled away to make that happen.  A very odd experience but I got the hang of it.  My mistake was not drying the bird.  Trying to apply a butter mix to a wet bird didn't fly.  (no wings)  My instructions were for slow roasting.  This means it cooks at 500 degrees for 30 mins and then 250 for about 2 hours.  It browns nicely and all the juices stay inside.

The mashed potatoes were easy as well.  I made a horseradish and parsley butter to go with it.  The butter tasted good on everything.  Now I own a ricer.  Yes, I had to look it up on the net.  I also checked out vids on chopping parsley and rosemary.  Laugh all you want but this geek knows his limitations.

I was so happy it all worked.  My folks showed up and we had a great time together.  I cancelled the reservation at the 'backup plan' and we stuffed ourselves silly.  My reward was a Victory Monkey on the Moon - half Golden Monkey and half Moonglow.  I sure am thankful.  -wallow-

Same old Fair

The York Fair is America's oldest running fair.  It's something that my family has been going to for decades.  My grandmother used to enter some of the contests/showings they have.  She had quite a few ribbons on her wall.  My parents wanted to go this year so my sister and I were their escorts.

It was a cloudy, drizzly day but at least the rain held off so we could move around outside.  This also kept the crowd size down.  The fair has all sorts of entertainment depending on the day as well as the regular fair stuff.  I am like my father with respect to wanting all the junk food I see.  But who doesn't?

My first victim was a red devil's food whoopie pie.  I already have an addiction to regular whoopie pies but these I cannot resist.  The name sounds like evil fun and they leave your mouth stained blood red.  We'll call this my second breakfast.

Sure you can go to the stand which sells fries, dogs, burgers, sausage, steaks, etc for lunch.  But why do that when you can get BBQ beef from a stand which specializes in it?  I added some horseradish and sauce to my sandwich and thoroughly enjoyed lunch.  Beasts like to eat meat.

We found a display celebrating Ringling Bros circus.  These modelers had collected or created figures relating to the circus and put them on display.  The display pictured above had moving characters as well.  There were some very threatening senior citizens in the room to make sure no one touched the models.  I'm sure I could have handled them separately but not if they ganged up on me so I kept my claws to myself.

Right next door was an actual circus!  It only had one ring and eight people total but it was a circus.  I don't have pictures because those same senior citizens were there making sure no one took any.  The show was fun and campy.

The fair is great for people watching too.  You can consider York county as the gateway to Pennsyltucky and it doesn't disappoint.  I enjoyed seeing the skinny father of two with a spider web tattoo under one eye and his round, multi-pierced baby momma following behind.  Then there was the girl with whisker implants in her upper lip, the bored teenie boppers and assorted other 'rural' folks who probably don't get out much other than for tractor pulls.  Don't get me wrong, I love to see all these people because it keeps things interesting.  And I freely admit to hanging a pair of handcuffs from the rear view mirror of my first car.  I also had a nude air freshner hanging as well.... which I bought at the York fair!  Ah the mammaries.

There were too many temptations.  How could I pass up a s'more on a stick?  I didn't!  It was tasty and I'm pretty sure it was nutritious.

They say size doesn't matter but don't believe it.  The big ones get the ribbons.  If it's green and wrinkly as well then it gets a ribbon too.  This room was like a vegetable freak show.

Just as my sugar high was wearing off, we stopped for a funnel cake.  I didn't get a picture of that because it went fast between the four of us.  Don't worry, we stopped for real food on the way home.

All is Fair

Since moving to the area, I had yet to go to any of the local fairs which occur this time of year.  I used to go as a kid and even worked at the bottle toss stand.  Let the tosser jokes commence...

Kimberton Fire Company puts on a good fair and is right down the road.  No fireworks this year however.  I guess they ran out of cash.  The area is a bit 'rural' and the crowd reflects that nicely.  I'm being nice here but others might say they are hicks or rednecks.  I'm not going to poke fun because it's too easy and I might be a redneck.

So games were played and food was eaten but you really need to know about these....

Those are deep fried Oreo cookies people.  Yes, they are as good as they look.  Piping hot, full of sugar and dripping with fat.  Then they top it with more sugar.  Served up with an 'I could care less' attitude from some teenager stuck inside a hot trailer surrounded by boiling oil.  Did I mention the sugar?

Next up was the Great Lakes Timber Show.  Real live lumberjacks!!

Here you see a wood chopping demonstration.  He got through that log in 21 seconds.  But there was also simple chainsaw carving, crosscut sawing and log rolling.  Then he threw that axe at a wood target quite accurately.  Now I could provide him with a couple addresses of targets I'd prefer to see get the axe.  Or perhaps he could train me?

Here's the crosscut saw versus chainsaw race.  The chainsaw lost this round.  The modified chainsaw he used for round two however cut that log like butter.  I want one!  It was probably all the sugar but I found myself cheering them on.  I didn't take shots of the log roll but that woman in the picture above rocked it.  She's a pro at spinning around on a wet piece of wood. (I couldn't resist)