The Ayes Have It

Like most men, I'm not keen on going to see a doctor.  Unfortunately it was required to get more contact lenses.  That's how they get cha.  Fortunately, my doc is cool and I have heath care.

When I was a younger beast, I was told the back of my eye was different.  Seems my optic nerve is larger than average.  Yes, you read correctly... I got a lot of nerve.  Factor my huge size in with the myopia and it can be symptomatic of glaucoma.  Doc's are always full of bad news.  To the Bat Cave!

He decides to take some photos of my eyes.  I immediately want to share them on the 'net.  With the size of my nerve, it's like geriatric porn.  Women will swoon, men will be envious.  Meanwhile, I consider what it's going to take to learn braille.

The photos show some irregularity so it's back to the Bat Cave for more tests.  My pupils dilated, eyes numbed, retina scanned and field of view tested.  At the end he tells me I'm exceedingly normal.  I got that written in my file.  You better believe that's what I want a doctor to say about me.  I also want a note from him to show a few people who think otherwise.