Tired but Wiser For the Time (10-10-10)

The time leading up to this date was much sadder than I expected.  I've been through my closure and got the answers I was looking for even if I had to do that on my own.  Now the proposed date has come and I hope I can stop thinking about all this crap.  I'm much better off without having a false person around.

(I'm just going to ramble so feel free to move on.  This post is more for me than you dear reader.)

Looking back I can see the red flags that paved the way to get to this point.  I can also see where I comprised once again.  I know relationships have compromise to work but there are some important areas to which this doesn't apply.  Compromise in these areas will lead to the relationship falling apart.  Doesn't matter how much love you have in your heart.

(blah blah blah)

As funny as it sounds, this was the best relationship I've had.  I really enjoyed being together and the things that we did.  I am happy with the way I conducted myself.  I put up with quite a bit including OCD issues, sense of entitlement, and lack of forgiveness.  She'd be happy to tell you I'd be paying for Valentine's day every year after our first one.  I thought she was doing something nice for us but found out she thought I should have offered to pay part of it.  Not that this was mentioned until much later.  It's crazy to think she held onto this after all I did for her and paid for throughout our time together. 

It would have been nice to get a heads up that she wasn't as happy.  But I've come to understand that women swing from tree to tree. (does this prove evolution?)  She wasn't going to leave this one until the next one was lined up.  If she shook the tree by telling the truth, she might have fallen out of it.  Of course I'm not the only one left out, she hasn't told her family or most of her 'friends' either.  I wonder when she'll tell them she's shacked up with grandpa?

So after all this I'm not even left with a friendship which is quite disappointing.  That was the final disrespect paid to me.  I am mature enough to handle going our separate ways and I could enjoy her finding happiness.  My wishes for her now are less than gallant.

(are you done yet?)

Yes, I am dating again and I remember what fun I had being single.  Meeting new people, seeing if there's any interest and then seeing how things progress.  Putting down the red flags as they show up and deciding if it's worth continuing.  I used to think this was too much trouble but I kind of enjoy it.  There's always hope of finding some good.  Meanwhile the rest of my social life has really picked up which has been fun and interesting.  I'll be probably be documenting it here.

(Finally!  Now let's see what tomorrow brings.  Right, now who's up for marching up the down the square?*)


*kudos and geek badge for those who get the reference